Fun night in PA!

Last night I went out with someone for dinner. Needless to say, I had a great time. It's not fun being stuck in a hotel room while I wait for Rajni to get off work so that she and I can do things together. She typically doesn't make it back to the hotel room until around 4. But then again, I spend most of my day sleeping, recovering from the night before (staying up, talking on the phone, facebook etc...)

Lucky for me, there's a place across the street from where we are staying that I have found. It's a nice pub/restaurant. Cool place to go for food and drinks.
So last night I went there, had a drink and went to a Thai restaurant with someone that I met from here. The experience was pleasant. But I thought it was funny when he brought to my attention that I have a Southern accent!! OMG! I thought my sister was teasing me when she told me a year ago that I had a country accent. I guess she was right because last night, another person just confirmed the same thing.

The experience last night was kind of refreshing. It's a good change from the entire Alabama atmosphere and venues. PA state is not bad at all. People are friendly and there's a lot of bigger cities nearby.

So a lot of people have been commenting about my "glow" ...That..I don't know how to respond to. All I know is...I have been getting a lot of rest lately and my stress level is at a very minimum stage. That must be it right?? LOL

I miss Vance. But I'll see him soon. I spoke to him yesterday and I'll call him again today. I am sure Erik is keeping him busy with video games. It's Vance's favorite past time! haha.

Alright....as soon as I got on this person's car last night, this song came on. It was on his playlist together with the other songs that I also listen to!! How awesome!. But this one particular song is stucked in my head. It's the first time I've heard this. It's a remix of the song of Rihanna and Eminem (I love The Way You Lie). But I like this one better. It's very well made and it flows. So here's the song!

Allentown, PA

This trip had been wonderful so far. We went to NYC Sunday and had a blast. One thing I noticed while I was there, everyone that were walking around were pretty much from all over the place. Not New Yorkers. It was such a melting pot. It reminded me so much of CA.

Rajni is at work during the day. Living me with not much to do but relax in my room. haha. Luckily, the hotel is next door to a wonderful pub. So during the day, I'd spend my day lounging around and catch up on things that I wouldn't otherwise do when I am at work. It's great! When she gets back from work, we go to all kinds of places. So far, we've covered the mall and great restaurant.

I went to the branch today and brought her lunch. The branch was all informed that I am a Personal Banker back in Alabama. They were very friendly and accomadating.

I really, really like Pensylvania. It's close to everywhere. It's diverse, modern and it seem to have everything that I want to do. Or perhaps, I have been deprived from "normalcy" from being in Alabama that anything that I see aside from Bama seems great! LOL

So yesterday when we went to NY, I noticed all sorts of fashion. I really love the fact that I can look around and see what people wear and look at what I wear and I completely in trend with the current fashion. I'm glad that inspite of bad economy that have lead to an extreme convervation, I have managed to keep up with my fashion...I don't think it has to be compromised if money or lack thereof is the issue. You can recycle a lot of things, repair old clothing or mix and old with the new. And from there, you have implemented your own unique fashion. LOL

I always get told by people that my style is young, professional, sleek, sophisticated, classy with a twist of a little bit if "sexiness".....Someone told me this lately and it just stucked on me. I guess you can combine all those description with a dash of sexiness. Hey, everyone's got their own unique style. So if mine happens to be those description that I mentioned above, I WILL TAKE IT! lol.

This trip has brought major positive impact on me. I have been doing a lot of self reflection lately. It has helped me cultivate some answers that I've been needing to receive.

There's a saying that you can get to the good without going through the bad. I feel like that's what happened here.

Some people back home have been keeping intouch with me. To say hello, how's my trip etc. It's wonderful to be missed! :-)

I spoke to Vance tonight. I miss the boy terribly. I hope he knows that mommy is recharging. Mommy needs a break sometimes so I can provide better care for him.

This is it for tonight...Tomorrow is an exciting day! :-) Good nights!!!

A reality check for that 48- year-old woman in McCalla. This is for you. HATERS!

Okay, so I am sitting at the airport waiting for my flight to board. I am beyond excited that I am finally getting a full week of vacation. This time, I'll be doing absolutely nothing but RELAX. My best friend have forewarned me that while I am away and spending time with her in Philly, I am estopped from bringing all the junk that has happened in Alabama the past several weeks. I am banned from discussing depressing issues and any negative aura.
While I am sitting here, I thought I was going to write MY response to the whole mishaps that has happened last week. After all, waiting at the airport for your departure is not the most exciting experience.

I would like to address that lady who has made such malicious comments about me on public a forum. She pretty much ambushed me out of nowhere. I met this lady 3 months ago. Hang out with her 2 twice. She happens to be friends with two of my other dear friends. The four of us have gathered in her house ONE time. She caught me in my most vulnerable moment when I was going through a break up (one of the break ups). I divulged a lot of information to her--unfortunately. I was ranting and she happened to be one of the recipient of my rant and frustration. From there, she gathered information, drew her own conclusion and her opinion about me spiraled out of control.

When she heard I reconciled with my estrange ex, she went through the roof followed by flaming e-mails on facebook and slinged all kinds of derogatory insults my way!..But now that I am no longer with him, she's still got her panty's on the wad.

Her reaction was mystifying considering that it's none of her business. It confused me as of why MY life and my choices affected her SO MUCH to a point where she's making volatile comments about me on facebook. She would update her status that would mainly talk about me subtly---I am this, and that. My life is full of "rubbish" and I am going nowhere! Bi-Polar much?
She's watching my every move on facebook, tagging herself on one of my pictures that I've taken and tearing it to pieces with her words. It's almost like an obsession. Two of my friends have intervened and asked her to stopped. I begged her to stop addressing me on public. She outright refused. I finally dropped the issue and told myself, this is a moot point. I didn't defend myself due to time constraints and lack of motivation to exchange childish jabs.
This woman is 48 (or so) years old mind you. So she's got a good 18 (maybe more) years of life experience than me. You'd think she'd be more mature or wiser! NOT!

I have came to realization that her extreme reaction towards MY personal life came from a deep seated pain that SHE herself experienced in the past. She shared something to us about her previous ex (prior to her current husband). I remember seeing pain in her eyes when she talked about this ex. His name was John. John apparently deceived her. He betrayed her and was not faithful to her. She shared how John lied to her about the engagement ring that she has discovered. When she confronted John about it, he indeed admitted that it was for another woman that he's been seeing. She also told the story about the love letter that fell out of John's wallet. It was a love story that was exchanged between John and the other woman.
It's transparent that she had her heart broken and was subjected to an emotional pain. My heart goes out to her and the plight that she had to experience with this guy.

If the explanation to her hostility has something to do with her past, I don't think it's fair. Getting cheated is a terrible thing!..I feel like she's taking her latent angry emotion for John ( an ex) and the other woman towards me!...She's connecting her painful experience to my current experience. She views me as a "MAN TAKER"...But the thing is..I didn't take HER man. LOL.

This woman is also a self-proclaim daughter of god. It makes me sick that she would speak religiously while attaching all kinds of venom in her words to inject it to me for the purposes of making me suffer and to induce emotional pain.

Two of my close friends tried talking to her and asked her what really is the matter? The explanation she provided was utterly bogus. She said she turned against me because I was NOT letting my ex pay his child support...She also added how I was selfish because I have not done anything to show that I love and support his children. Ummm....hello....first of all, I DID NOT prevent him from paying his child support. The guy was an employed, thus no child support can be contributed to 3 of his children.

And as for "showing" love to his children...how could I possibly do that when they're not even around. (Three children came from TWO DIFFERENT women). They live in two different states. Again, this is none of her business.
The only explanation to this whole thing is----->>>>she's got a personal vendetta against me because my ex left his previous relationship to be with me. Therefore, her sympathy doesn't get rewarded to me but more so for that woman that my ex was with before me. Ummm....yea...*rolling eyes. Pitty party!!!!

I doubt that this woman will secede from attacking me. She's gone through the extreme to get a reaction out of me. She's also disregard my physical look by "comparing me" and the woman that my ex was with before me. Which I can see where she's coming from with all of this (victim mentality). It's ironic because she never met the person..I know she's just saying this to hurt me and get a reaction out of me just like what my EX did. (Said all kinds of aweful things because he was hurt and he wanted to hurt me as well).

And how could she possibly gather an accurate comparison?.. It's not like I don't know who she's comparing me to...haha. I HAVE seen the person. In fact, I've hang out with her many times for several months. .NOTHING special about this woman. She's a pure version of "plain Jane"...I can tell you this much.....I don't think being a 4'11 with double F breast size is attractive. And I don't think having a "mannish" looking face with BIG nose and teeth that looks like a horse is what I define PRETTY or attractive. And I don't think being 4'11 who weights 150 lbs (when I met her) is what I would consider hot. According to the people that have seen her, she looks like a "DUDE" who have gone under the knife but the doctor have made a major critical error during a surgical procedure and have given her TOO MUCH BREAST...
I really have nothing against the person whom she's comparing me to, but I would just like to make a valid point that the comparison is beyond ridiculous!

Beauty is beyond the physical. Personality, values, intellect and the other components counnts as well. But as an overall statistic, the person she's comparing me too is NOT EVEN IN MY LEAGUE. It's almost saying that Dolly Parton is BETTER looking than Megan Fox or a super model from Victoria's secret. But then again, beauty is about perception. What she perceives as beautiful might not be what the rest of the population agrees on. I'll just leave it at that...I am aware that I am stepping to her level by responding to her critques; but I think it's the only way to deal with her.

This 48 year old woman from McCalla is a "SUPPORTER" of my ex-husband's ex.
I also suspect that she's collaborating with him to hurt me. Due to the fact that there's legal/criminal consequences if he attempts to contact me, she's playing the part as an accessories. They are friends on facebook. Figures. She doesn't realize that she's just being used as a proxy....Poor old lady. *sigh* She's either extremely bored or she has developed a "Jamie disorder" haha.

I have lost ALL respect for this woman. And as far as me not having a purpose---ummm....I HAVE AT LEAST BORE A CHILD FOR 9 MONTHS AND HAVE GONE THROUGH THE EXPERIENCE OF BIRTHING ONE. What's your purpose Miss lady from MCalla? You are almost in your 50 and you will never be able to feel what is it like to have a biological children. Talking about curse and damnation? Look at yourself, there's a reason why god did not bless with with a child. There's a reason why you have NEVER experience the joy of pregnancy, the tears of happiness when your child is born. That's a blessing that most women are given. YOU don't have that. Look at yourself in the mirror before you fling judgements my way.You're supposed to act like a role model because of your elderly wisdom. But you have no concept of that do you?

I think my environment and my success can speak for itself. I am young, capable, intelligent, and full of potential. Unlike you, it's not too late nor am I too old to achieve the things that I have not been able to achieve successfully. The world is mine. LOL. I am successful in my career, I HAVE A CHILD, I am beautiful and sky is the limit. You, however is stuck with what you have. It's too late for you to change or achieved the things you don't have. You'll NEVER have a child!!!

And oh yea...are you even getting a driver's license soon? You're making me laugh....
I'm sorry to disappoint you but I am actually quite happy and content with my life. I've hit some rough patches lately but it's getting so much better and it will continue to go improve from here.

I've tried my best to make a marriage work..But I was investing my effort and energy on a wrong marriage and a wrong person. I was going down the path that his ex-wife was. He was slowly losing his respect for me. Became extremely possessive and aggressive. I showed him that I am NOT the type that would condone disrespectful behavior....Person he was with before me had an extended and ample patient for his disrespectful and abusive behavior.... NOT ME. She stucked around in spite all the abused and the lack of love for her. Again, NOT ME... I am not at all desperate. I have options. Tons of options! I refused to live that way. I DESERVE MORE THAN WHAT HE COULD OFFER. To condense this, I was pretty much a diamond that fell on his lap. I know that he feels intense anger towards me. He felt like I "used" him and never valued him... Maybe I did, maybe I didn't...LOL

My plane is now boarding so I better close this. I want to show you that you're NOT the only one who can hurt people's feelings. I am TOO! But if you can't resist the inclination to badger me, then by all means do it. I am not going to let you bully me again. Via public forum, telephone or in person. BRING IT ON GRANDMA! You picked a wrong person to have a fight via writing! LOL.

Now, let me enjoy my paid vacation with my best friend while you go to work and fry those catfish... And from now on...anything you'll say about me..my response would be "KISS MY ASS!!!". *****Refer to the picture above. You don't can't act respectfully, you don't deserve my respect! You have lost all credibility!!!HATERS!!!

Personal Banker training day 1

Today was the first day of training. Last night I was a bit anxious because this is the first time that I brought Vance with me. I really enjoy having him with me. He's my little travel buddy.

Got up pretty early today. I was anxious to hear from my back up child care rep to let me know that the daycare center that they've booked for Vance had a vacancy. I have to say, they were extremely helpful and executed things in a timely manner.

I got a call informing me that the daycare center is ready to go. What a relief!

Arrived at the training with plenty of time to check e-mail, make phone calls etc. That was not quite as stressful as I thought.

Today and tomorrow is all about loans. We're covering policy and guidelines for all sorts of loans/lines. Consumer, car, home, etc. Leaning about the federal regulations, compliance, procedure and what not. It got pretty slow and very boring towards in the middle that I had a hard time staying awake.

It's really good for me to go to this. Not only that it's a paid training, it is also good for my career advancement.

Not to brag or anything but the "asian" side of me prevails when it comes to lending, finance and banking matters. My fellow team members love asking me questions and asking me for help--especially during the final assesment. LOL. I love helping of course.

Of course there are boring and mind numbing topics to cover such as Reg-D, Reg-E, Reg-Z, Reg- DD, HMDA, RESPA, etc.

For the most part, it's pretty interesting actually. Our trainer is great. He's very knowledgeable and full of resources of course. It feels like dejavu for me of course. I was just here 7 months ago.

Tomorrow is our last day here. Vance and I will check out in the morning and I'll pick him up from the day care after work. And from there, we'll head back home.

I want to take this boy to the museum but the weather is is extremely cold!! I might bring him back here this summer..

Alright, getting tired. Going to do down the lobby and hang out by the fireplace with Vance while having some soda (milk for him). lol

P!nk - Fuckin' Perfect (Fan Music Video)

Sailing along

Going to summarize everything that has happened the past two days. Friday was pretty hectic. I was supposed to leave town to go to Huntsville Thursday night but due to the weather condition, I was told by my manager to wait until the following morning. Thursday night, I didn't get much sleep at all. Probably a total of 3 hours.

Woke up the following morning, reported to work just to find out that I had to leave that morning to go to Huntsville to attend my first day of training as a Personal Banker. Went to my office and grabbed the stuff I needed to bring. There's a banker there who's spotting me while I'm gone; needless to say, it's quite strange seeing someone in my office with my stuff laying around and my son's picture frame right next to my computer. ha!

Drove to Huntsville. Got there late. But of course, my instructor was informed already that I'll be running late.

Sat in class all day. Surprisingly, I was able to absorbed and take in so much information that day. Considering how stress I felt especially from the night before, I managed to get 92 on my last test. I can tell everyone was anxious to go home since it was Friday. A fellow team member was lagging behind. As a good samaritan, I decided to help her with her test. With me helping her, she was able to pass the test and allowed everyone to be dismiss. So she was grateful of course.

I was in a hurry to get out of class because I have to drive back to get my son from his day care, drive to Anniston and drop him off to his dad. I probably drove a total of 400 miles that day. Proudly to say, I did it and did it well...

Following morning (Saturday) I had to work. We had set up a booth at the Black Magic expo at BJCC. With 4 Personal bankers on duty and three branch managers and one district manager, we dominated and had a good outcome from the event.

We represented the company. I got several boost from my managers telling me that I was very successful in generating prospects. I probably talked to 50 business owners and got 15 appointments from them to come to the bank and talk to me about their business banking needs.

I stayed there until it was time for me to leave.

Now, it's Sunday afternoon. I am packing to leave for Huntsville. I am waiting for Vance to be drop off. I made some major negotiation with his dad that I am going to CEASE driving every Sunday but rather have him drive here to drop him off.

With Friday being the same, I think I'm NOT really doing Vance a favor by driving all the way to Anniston every Sunday. If anything, he gets to spend more time with his father if he gets drop off to me.

I'm doing his dad a favor, and as of right now, that favor is costing me a lot of money. So I am going to continue the Friday drive but Sunday drive back is pretty much NOT an option for me. So there's that....

I'm going to leave here as soon as Vance gets here. I have made back up baby sitter in Huntsville where he will be staying while I'm in class. Fortunately for me, I work for a company that offers back-up child care--it's one of our benefits. So the center is booked and Vance will spend 2 days there while I'm in training.

Things are coming along. I spent some time with my friend last night and spoke to several over the phone. The house is clean, I have this new kick-ass laptop, I got a new phone, and bills are paid on time. Life is good and the basic is taking care of. For now, I'd give myself a five star and count this as a blessing considering the stress, ordeal and mishaps that I have to deal with lately.

Will try to attend Church tonight if possible. If not, next Sunday for sure! I was supposed to go with a friend to her church but she came down with a cold so I spent my morning configuring my laptop and cleaning the house.

Being able to handle, juggle, multi-task all this stuff and do such a great job at is is empowering!

New Life- New Year 2011

Tonight seem very peaceful. Suffice it to say, I am utterly drained. Had about 4 hours of sleep last night. I wonder how people survived now days with that much sleep....

Anyway, back to my thoughts..Michael and I reconnected for almost 7 months now. Things are splendid for the most part. Our dealings with each other has drastically changed. Not so much drama like it used to. It shouldn't be. Michael and I are in a much better stage of our lives now. Things are much more clear between us. We've found a true definition to our relationship...I know we've always loved each other. Our desire to be with each other was so strong that it manifested in so many ways. It was so obvious to those who's watching from the outside. We tried to abate and plastered our obvious feelings for each other with denial, but it only made things worse.

Things fell apart between us over a year ago. I drove our love to end unknowingly. I didn't know what to do at the time. I was very confuse and lost of direction. I was back and forth and simply cannot make up my mind. I confused Michael as well to a point where he thought I was just playing games and that he got "played". For the way I acted then, I wouldn't blame him for thinking and believing so...

Michael's love was always solid and unwavering towards me. It stayed like that until I pushed him away. We fell apart for several months (close to 10 months). Our last encountered left us with NO closure. We barely said goodbye. In fact, it ended very bitterly and quickly. Needless to say, that temporary break was "necessary" and vital. It helped us do the right thing and it gave us a more clarity to make lucid judgment and decisions.

Almost a year later, him and I reconnected. Michael attempted to contact me so many times while we were apart. Via text, facebook and sometimes a call. I've painfully declined all contact from the beginning by not responding. It took every strength that I had NOT say anything but I knew it had to be done. I firmly believed that it was destructive for him and I to be in contact with each other while we were having to deal with a lot of things in front of us. So I made him a bargain--and that was to tell him NOT to communicate with me and to come to me only when things are taken care of from both ends (my side and his side). The process took a while especially on his side due to the "mishaps" that he had to deal with. He explained the dilema, and the "SITUATION" that he was faced against on his first few e-mails but I ignored it.

As months passes, things started to become more clear. As intended, I wanted to clear my mind before I wanted Michael back in my life again...Furthermore, while taking a break and dusting myself off, I also did a lot of self reflection as far as where I stand, how I feel about relationships and how I really felt about us.
I did not want him to distract me while I took the time to recognize some important things about me and what I want.

Suffice it to say, those months of break was essential for healing (at least it was for me). It was such a crucial stage in my life where I really needed to be alone, ponder about a lot of things.

I eventually made it through the rough patch and decided to return the correspondences from him "slowly". Then from there, the channel of communication was open between us again. But this time, it was different. We have both been through a lot. A LOT of changes that is...And from there, we picked up where we left off but this time, it was so much better and clearer (at the very least, it was for me). LOL

Taking you to our present life--things have not been perfect. We have our quarrel and problems. Actually, now that we're husband and wife, life is more realistic. Dealing with the daily grind, kids, work, house chores, bills, and a lot of day to day mundane routine.

We haven't seen Michael's girls in a while. I miss them. Someday they will be here again. We're having to jump through hoops to get this taken care of. But I pray that someday, he will have his 3 girls closer to him.

Okay, enough with the boring, mellow dramatic, soap opera part of this blog. I'm not going to fail to recognize the fact that my "love story" with my current husband is almost as good as the movie "The Notebook". LOL. It's unconventional, unique, intense, real, a roller coaster, full of hardship in the beginning but finally became a happily ever after story.

To those who has witnessed and have seen us back then can testify the same thing. My husband DID EVERYTHING to chase after me, to show me he wanted nothing but me, to make me his and only his, and sacrificed EVERYTHING just to be with me. I can confidently say and validate that I have NEVER seen nor have I known anyone who pursued after someone so hard as much as Michael pursued and have worked so hard just to be with me. It was two forces and gravity that even the world cannot seperate. From the very first day we met, our life was forever changed---I changed his and he changed mine. THAT WAS US, AND IT WILL REMAIN THAT WAY. Nevertheless, every effort, struggles, and frustration was ALL worth it! My love only grows stronger each day for him.

Michael wasn't EXACTLY part of my plan when we first met; but things ended up that way anyway.... LOL. I never pre-meditated or plan anything. In fact, I used to think he was insane, out of his mind, delusional whenever he would pull me aside and sneakily tell me his feelings. Each time he would divulge his emotions, I remember rolling my eyes, poking fun of him and laughing.

Heck, he thinks back then (and now) that I am WAYYYY WAYYY out of his league and he still have a hard time believing in the beginning (and presently)that a girl "like me" would even look at him and married him for that matter!. But I proved him WRONG! Absolutely wrong! hahaha. And yes, I have ceased the poking fun of him and obviously have taken him seriously (when appropriate). LOL

Hmmm...sleep deprivation sure have a significant effect on my ability to keep my thoughts together. I can't seem to stay awake so I'm going to close this blog for tonight.

Wow, this is my best attempt to condense everything that has happened with me in the past 7 months....I'm going to vaguely add here that Vance is growing so fast!!! He's such an intelligent, sometimes stubborn, witty little boy. He's just like me and sometimes just like his dad too!!
Talking about his dad, he is temporarily residing in Atlanta. He graduated law school last year and is now practicing law. He gets Vance every weekend. He's engaged to a fine young woman from here. Unfortunately for me, I am stuck here in the south until Vance is at the appropriate age (whenever that might be).
This boy is the center of mine and his dad's life right now. His mom is a Personal Banker and his dad is an Attorney, I have a good feeling that he will be spoiled rotten.
Oh yea, my Personal Banker training starts this Friday in Huntsville. Michael and Vance are coming with me. We will be spending our 3 days in a hotel that my company has booked for me. I will be in class/training during the day and Michael and Vance will find things to do while I'm in class. Fortunately, the hotel is close to the space museum. So I could imagine they'll spend quite some time there.